Hey everyone. Thank you all so much for subscribing to my YouTube series. My series will discuss the many aspects of having endometriosis and how I handle them. I am not a professional. I just want to share my journey, my tips, and my support for other women with the same condition. Support that I needed, and still need. It's a support group for women like myself.
Last year I read an article in one of my favorite local papers. It stated that, "Vlogging killed the blogger". I knew in that moment that I would have to expand my blog. To reach a larger audience. With the hopes that along with my story, more awareness would be raised. As well as dispelling the many myths, misconceptions, and ignorance about endometriosis. It was this article that gave me reassurance regarding the idea of adding Vlogs. It still took me numerous takes in front of he camera, to get comfortable with sharing my life with the world. One that people shut out, or pretended to ignore. I didn't know how I was going to express something that most individuals didn't acknowledge.
Me being a better writer, than public speaker. I was initially hesitant about starting my blog and video blogs. I delayed the virtual blogs because I enjoy my privacy. Yet, that had to be something that I would have to let go of. In order me to be properly understood. Bout an illness that hides in the bodies of seemingly healthy women..This was like broadcasting a section of my journal, for the world to see. Even if you know me in real life. You may or may not be aware of my many capabilities. Hell, it took me years to realize that I was able.
Along with changes with I learned a lot about myself. People began to perceive me differently. I decided to fuil that negativity into something positive. I cut off anyone who I felt was intentionally disrespectful. I know that often times when doing the unthinkable. That I would be seen as crazy. Or some people would make nasty comments because they arent brave enough to speak up In their own lives. I knew ahead of time that people may or may not be receptive to it. Knowing this starting out, I had to be brave in spite of it. My journey serves a purpose. I have to continue to spread light on endometriosis. By sharing intimate details of my life. This gave me the courage I needed to be more expressive.
Along with being plagued by many health issues. All of these aspects gave me the platform to be who I needed to be. I shed my old image, like a beautiful flower shedding its petals. Or the leaves falling in October. When a person changes, it often prompts questions and judgements. Which is reactionary. People want and expected me to stay the same. Or for me to be defeated by the obstacles in my journey. Especially when they are from the same environment as I am. Yet, it shaped and molded me differently. So naturally, it was assumed that my circumstances had changed me. Yet, they did. They changed me for the better.
I changed along with my circumstances. The past no longer suited who I'd become. Who I am now. Coming from a background where the women in my family are very familiar with pain. Pain that only women can relate to. They to make many assumptions. That I'm over exaggerating. That my pain wasn't so bad. These assumptions coming from other women who experience similar symptoms.
People are entitled to their opinion. However, I used reach out. To ask about what their health issues were like for them. They would often make their health seem worse than mine. Just to downplay my condition. Which is frustrating. Even them being completely aware of my condition and for my age. I still don't get empathy? Endometriosis is something that can't be seen. People don't believe what they can't see. Sadly even if they are aware of it. Or maybe even experienced it themselves.
After so long I don't expect it anymore. It is what it is. I know that my mother dealt with this. Her mother, and so on. It's even difficult for her to discuss endometriosis with me. I believe that comes from her not being properly understood and misdiagnosed. Most of us with endo aren't alone in with the things we inherit. So the though of me conceiving a little girl. Who may inherit it too. Weighs heavy on my mind. I fear for her pain already. Along with other young women. I look at my nieces and cousins. I pray that this gene skips them. I want for endo to be ok to discuss by then. For it it to properly understood by then. I don't want her to go through what I went through. It was one of the things that gave me courage to say, "I can do this!" I'm going to talk about endo no matter if people want to hear it or not. Being an advocate comes along with telling my story. I have to fight for the evidence of things unseen. We can't see our faith. Yet, we still keep it. I will continue to raise awareness...
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